One of my readers wrote:
“Paul, I get a lot out of your blog – love your Dutch bluntness – it’s always a refreshing addition to my inbox. On my studio wall is a print-out of an excerpt from your blog post about perfectionism. I glance at it every day to remind myself to focus on “practice,” not “perfection.”
There’s nothing more satisfying than receiving a message like this from one of my readers. In fact, words like these keep me going on days I don’t feel like going anywhere.
Being a voice over means signing up for a reclusive lifestyle. As a reluctant extrovert, it’s one of the many aspects of my job that makes it such a good fit. But even though I generally love what I do -professionally speaking- some days I would rather curl up in a ball, and not be recording some poorly written script for an impatient client.
I believe that most of what we see and hear about the life of a voice over, especially on social media, is almost too romantic. It seems too good to be true. There’s all these smiling faces in front of microphones telling us they made even more money this month, than during the same time last year.
Well, good for you!
Look, there’s a colleague who has bought a shiny $4000 microphone. Big whoop! And watch that girl… she just landed a national commercial and wants the whole world to know.
On one hand it’s wonderful to celebrate your successes publicly, but for those who aren’t as accomplished or experienced, it can be pretty depressing and disheartening. Your success sucks! Keep in mind, every time one person wins an audition, there are tons of disappointed “losers.”
I understand the need for certain people to pat themselves on the back in public. For some it’s validation. For others it might be vindication. But there’s a downside to it.
Nothing you will ever say about yourself, will be as powerful as what others say about you.
Your own words will always be taken with a big grain of salt. I mean, why wouldn’t you present yourself in a positive light? In that respect you’re no better than a loud TV commercial people are inclined to distrust.
“Be proud, but don’t applaud yourself,” my mother used to say. “That’s other people’s job.”
Coach and voice over Terry Daniel had this to say:
“I’m all for posting about a booking! There’s nothing wrong with that but when people have to post about EVERY booking, it comes across as a bit insecure. The big-time pros just book and record their work. They don’t feel the need to jump on social media and grandstand about every booking. “
Stephane Cornicard made an important distinction, showing us that it’s not all black or white:
” I think we are all a bit guilty of sharing our booking good news too readily. At the same time sometimes you just HAVE to share… I think what needs to be ascertained is the intent behind the post and analyse our response to it similarly. When someone I am not very fond of, or I don’t think is particularly talented or deserving, posts about their success, it tends to annoy me. When it’s a friend, or when I value their work and talent, it makes me happy for them…”
My colleague Patrick Kirchner put it very well when he wrote:
“For anyone who has been in this job long enough to make the full loop of the roller coaster: When we are at the top, it’s our job to help those whose turn it is to be at the bottom. When we are at the bottom, we’re looking for those at the top to be encouraging, not to remind us they’re at the top. Sometimes that roller coaster moves pretty steeply and quickly.”
When you have someone else spontaneously sing your praises, that’s the kind of exposure money can’t buy. It’s genuine, heartfelt, and persuasive.
So, thank you, dear reader. You’ve made my day!
Humbly yours,
Absolutely agree! Quiet confidence and silent observation is almost always where I prefer to be. Another great post and I love your “Created with Human Intelligence” tag too.
Thank you Jason. Of course we, as small business owners, need to tell the world about what we’re doing. We can’t afford to be silent because then, no one will hear us. But I think we need to change the conversation from being self-congratulatory to letting our work and those who enjoy that work, speak for us. My mom always taught me: “Don’t applaud yourself.” Humility is still a virtue.
Good reviews are manna from Heaven – you can glow for weeks on one.
These kinds of posts are why you have a wider appeal. Good job. Keep writing them.
I appreciate you saying that. I may use examples from the world of voice overs, but I think that many of the lessons apply to anyone running a small one-person business.
Thanks, Paul. I am a person who hates to “blow my own horn”. In fact, I find that type of behavior uncomfortable at best, and repulsive at worst. However, looking back at my life I also can truthfully say I have not been as professionally successful (outside of VO) as those who do. The ones who show off and announce every success are most often the ones who move ahead, regardless of relative skill or experience. So the trick is to find the right balance, right? I will publicly post about a job once in a while, mostly because I feel like I need to, or as a public note of thanks to the company or producer. Otherwise, if I am excited about a job I did, I will probably only mention it to a few friends who I know will be happy for me even if they might have auditioned for the same job. It’s a good thing to have those people in your life, especially as our careers can be so isolating.
As voice overs, we serve the stories we tell. In my view, we should use any type of promotion to highlight those stories instead of ourselves. Instead of the gratuitous “look at me” angle, why not use social media to promote the book we’ve narrated or the documentary we voiced. If we did a good job, we will be noticed and we will get good, unsolicited reviews. As I said in my piece, these reviews are more authentic and powerful than anything we could say about ourselves.
Paul, I read your blog regularly and I get a lot out of what you have to say, but why do you seem so anti social on a personal level? When I tried to make contact with you, it seemed you blew me off. So, of course, I was offended.
Your points about letting others sing your praises rather than doing it yourself is spot on. But as worthwhile as your blog is, I don’t have a desire to edify you all that much even though I do respect your talent and experience. Just thought you should know.
First off, I have no idea what you are referring to when you said I seemed to have blown you off, and I offended you. Please clarify. I’m not in business to offend people, but I do keep a strong boundary between my personal and my professional life. That’s why I have a personal Facebook profile for friends, family, and close colleagues, and a professional Facebook page for those in the business. People who want to befriend me using the personal FB profile are always notified of my reasons. Some are offended and feel rejected. Others completely understand.
As I have once again reiterated in this article, I do consider myself to be a “reluctant extrovert.” That means I am basically a shy and very private person who has learned to live in a world of more extroverted people. I needed to develop a more outgoing persona to do my job as a roaming reporter for Dutch media, and later as the content creator I have become. Overall, I’m more comfortable by myself, especially after I developed misophonia as a result of my stroke.
Does that make me antisocial? I don’t like labels, but I do know that I have to protect myself from people that are pushing and crossing my boundaries (perhaps without even knowing it).
Fine lines between self-promotion and humility
Thanks Paul
I’m not saying people shouldn’t be promoting themselves, but I am saying that when others are singing your praises, it will have greater impact.
I’m not sure which of this post I love the most. You had me at poorly written scripts and impatient clients. I’ve been in VO for 20+ years. But only in my own shop for a year. I guess I just assumed that people on social media were “bragging” to get cred and supposedly more business. But after watching it for a year’s cycle I’m glad to read a blog post that expresses my thoughts and feelings EXACTLY Thanks.
I knew I wasn’t the only one with these feelings! Thanks for sharing my sentiments, Steve.
Now, there seems to be a misunderstanding between certain commentators on social media. They seem to believe that I am totally against posting any success stories. I don’t think it’s that black and white. People are free to post anything they believe will put them in a more favorable light. What I’m saying is that the frequent “Look at ME” posts tend to get a bit stale after a while. Any professional trumpeter can toot his own horn loudly, but when a music critic sings his or her praises, people pay attention. What’s more, they tend to attach greater value to what the critic has to say.
So, my advice to my colleagues would be to use social media so people can get to know you and develop some kind of an invisible but positive bond. Show them samples of your work without telling them how great you think you are. That’s for them to decide.
I also think the way people promote their successes makes a difference. I believe when someone books a gig the post should center around the actual gig rather than centering around the actor. In other words promote the project and not you personally.
I couldn’t agree more. Or as I like to say: “Do it for the music. Not for the applause.”
King Solomon agrees with you.
“Let someone else praise you, and not your own mouth; Others, and not your own lips.”
(Proverbs 27:2)
Solomon was a wise man!