You know how they always say that it’s important to stay POSITIVE on social media? By the way, do you even know who they are and what they are basing this on? The same people tell you that it’s also very important to be AUTHENTIC and REAL on social media.
Well, authentically speaking, real life isn’t always positive, and to pretend otherwise is kind of silly. There is a lot of drama in our lives, and -like in every TV show ever written- if there’s no drama, it becomes uninteresting. If you’ve read my recent Instagram post, you already know how important “interestingness” is, as a way to stand out from the crowd.
DON’T WORRY. BE HAPPY!
So, why are we told to pretend everything is always hunky-dory? Well… THEY tell us we don’t want to come across as complainers, crybabies, Debby Downers, or irritable grumpy whiners. It’s not good for our precious “reputation.” Clients might look us up online and read our latest rants, and decide we’re bad news.
While I do believe it’s generally preferable to stay kind, polite, and nice online, nice people have a hard time standing out, as opposed to opinionated people. Nice people are kind of colorless. People who always put on a smile and wear rose-colored glasses are fake and annoying. I should add that opinionated people can be very nice too, but they don’t always come across that way.
Anyway, 25-year old Daphne from the Netherlands put all of the above to the test when she shared her job search frustrations on LinkedIn. Daphne studied International Business and graduated cum laude in three instead of four years. She’s a smart cookie!
Filled with hope she starts applying to jobs. However, she never makes it past the first selection due to lack of work experience. There are plenty of suitable jobs being advertised, but employers always ask for two years of prior work experience! The only real experience Daphne has had, was at a supermarket and delivering newspapers when she was fourteen.
But how do you get experience if no one offers you a job? Even when you graduate with high honors?
BEING REAL AND AUTHENTIC
“It’s pointless,” Daphne says in a heartfelt rant on LinkedIn. “I spend hours writing customized cover letters, asking for references and filling out detailed forms, only to receive an automated rejection. I’m highly qualified. Why is it so hard to find a job?”
I understand her pain, but is it a smart move for Daphne to put herself out there in public, complaining about the job market as potential employers read every word she’s saying? Isn’t it wiser to stay positive and optimistic? I mean, who wants to hire a young woman who likes to whine?
Well, it turns out that Daphne’s frustrations resonated with many people in her situation. Within days, her personal confession was liked and shared hundreds of times, and it even made the news.
And what do you think happened as a result?
She’s finally being noticed by recruiters! As you are reading these words, the first job offers are coming in!
Daphne is no longer overlooked. She says:
“All you need is ONE person who is willing to take a chance on you. One!”
So, the next time you’re tempted to pretend to be another fake happy camper on social media, think again.
Being real may get you better results!
Rowell Gormon says
…what a breath of cool air for this old grouch, whose posts are just as apt to be sarcastic as not, but who still has a lot of people who think I’m a pretty nice guy. Thanks for this story. And I can identify with the young lady. My standard line for people wanting to get into radio was: “they want someone 25 years old with 30 years of experience”.
Joshua Alexander says
Good points! I’m going to start complaining right now!! I hate everything!!! Why is it so hard to find a good blog?!?!? OH!!! I found one!!! Nevermind.
I totally believe in authenticity. I do wear my heart on my sleeve, but I try to balance it with positivity. And I try to balance positivity with vulnerability. When I’m struggling, I’ll usually say it; I just don’t want to go TOO far into revealing the spiral I’m (probably) in, because I can carry others down in there with me into the maelstrom. So I try to keep us all afloat with such posts, realizing that words have power to influence emotions. It’s a fine balance! I totally get the dichotomy between stressing both positivity AND authenticity though. They are not always mutually exclusive!
Paul Schmidt says
Yes sir. We can talk about unpleasant things and still be emotionally intelligent about it as this young lady was.