“Why do clients always think they can play me?” said one of my students. Let’s call her Ella.
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“Well, first they try to nickel and dime me, and then they expect me to record a major revision of a script for free. After going above and beyond to keep them happy, they wait months and months to pay me. I’m sick of it! Who do they think I am? Some kind of doormat?”
“If anything, you’re a goody two-shoes,” I said, “and that might be part of your problem.”
“How so?” my student wanted to know.
“I’ll get to that in a moment,” I responded. “First you have to acknowledge something I had to learn the hard way.”
“And what is that?”
“It’s the fact that it’s virtually impossible to change other people. You can only change yourself. So, if you want a different response from a client, you have to change the way you respond to them. That’s the way it works in any type of relationship. And when you act differently, your environment might start to treat you differently.”
“Can you give me an example?” Ella asked intrigued.
“Sure. Here’s one thing I noticed when we started working together,” I said. “You’re a very friendly person who will go out of her way to please people. You also have a tendency to become very informal very quickly.
Now, there’s nothing wrong with being a kind and open person. However, you can be friendly and business-like at the same time. There’s no need to share all kinds of personal details with someone you know professionally. You work together to get a job done. You don’t have to become best buddies. In fact, I think it’s often best to keep your personal life out of it.
Because you tend to be so informal with everybody, some clients might get the impression that you’re not very professional. It’s a lot easier to push people around who don’t seem to know what they’re doing. Do you know what I mean?”
“I totally get it,” Ella said. “I probably come across as someone who is very naive and inexperienced.”
“It wouldn’t surprise me, Ella, and part of this business is all about perceptions. If people perceive you to be weak in one area, they’ll take advantage of it.”
“So what do I do?” Ella asked.
“Use your secret weapon,” I said. “Use your voice!
I have noticed that your voice has a tendency to go up at the end of most sentences. You might not even be aware of it, but it sounds like you’re not very certain of yourself. Everything ends in a question. It makes you sound insecure. And if you seem insecure, clients won’t trust you. We’ve got to work on that.”
“Perhaps I am insecure,” said Ella. “I don’t have a lot of experience, and I don’t want to lose a client because he doesn’t like me.”
“Thanks for bringing that up,” I said. “Correct me if I am wrong, but it seems to me that you are rather inclined to take things personally. Is that true?”
Ella nodded.
“That’s going to be tough in this business. Very tough. In any given week you’ll hear a lot of no’s, and very few yeses. If you take every single no as a personal rejection, you’ll be absolutely miserable. And I don’t want that to happen. You’re too talented.
Unless you completely messed up, or the quality of your recording was abysmal, it is never about you. It is all about the subjective opinion of the person casting the job. Emphasis on subjective.
Now, back to using your voice.
If you end your sentences with a period instead of with a question mark, you’ll sound a lot more confident. Period. You might not feel entirely confident, but the client doesn’t know that. You also have to work on your breathing, but that’s for another day.
Secondly, keep things strictly business. Remember, you are the expert. That’s why they’re thinking of hiring you. They’re not looking for a new friend.
Take charge of the conversation, and -if it is a new client- explain how you usually work. Let the client know they’re in good hands. And one more thing: stop apologizing all the time. You came in seven minutes ago, and you’ve already apologized ten times for things that weren’t even your fault. Why?
“I’m sorry,” said Ella…
And then she realized what she was doing. She blushed, and said: “I didn’t mean to interrupt.”
“I know you’re not doing it on purpose, but it’s not doing you any favors. Did you have a Catholic upbringing?”
“No, said Ella. “I’m Jewish.”
I laughed.
“Now, let’s get back to what we were talking about. I was giving you some advice, so here’s another thing I want you to consider: only take on a job you know you can handle. Be clear about your policies and procedures, and be firm about your rates. Never negotiate a rate after the fact. Get to an agreement before you go into the studio, and confirm things in writing ahead of time. Are you following me?”
“I’m listening,” said Ella, “and it all makes sense. I just don’t know if I can come across as someone who has been doing this for years. I don’t want to pretend to be someone I’m not. That’s not who I am.”
“I understand that” I said, “but here’s the good news:
In this business you get paid to pretend.
I just recorded a voice-over for a pharmaceutical company, and I played the part of a neurologist. The day before I worked on a guided tour for a museum, and I was cast as a historian. Who knows what they want me to be tomorrow? A mad scientist? A cartoon character? A Flying Dutchman? That’s the fun of this job! You can pretend to be anyone you want, and make some money too! The better you are at pretending, the more in-demand you’ll be as a voice-over.
If you can convince the client you mean business, you are in business.”
Ella looked at me, and I could see that my words had ignited a spark.
“Ella, listen to me. You know that as soon as you get a script that reads like it’s been written for you, you’ll knock it out of the park, right? In other words: it’s not even a matter of being qualified or not. It’s a matter of you believing in yourself. Don’t you agree?
A wise teacher once said: You can pretend anything, and master it.
So, let’s start this coaching session by “pretending” you know the ropes, okay? We’ll do a mock conversation with a potential customer. I’ll be the obnoxious client, and you’ll be the brilliant voice talent. It is your job to convince me that you are the right person for the job.
Are you game?”
Ella smiled.
“As in voice acting, you might need a few takes before you hit the nail on the head, but by the time we’re done, you’ll know how to respond like a pro, and you’ll never be played again.
How does that sound?”
Paul Strikwerda ©nethervoice
PS Be sweet. Please retweet.
photo credit: Wanderin’ free | Part of your world via photopin (license)
As I’m reading this article, I started to remember some times when clients took advantage of my good nature and willingness to take on almost any job. I admit, I felt some real embarrassment! I probably even winced with mental pain. You’ve hammered this point home in a number of articles, Paul: one has to stand up for oneself or clients will gladly walk all over you. It’s also called setting limits with people. Please, keep slapping us upside the head to remind us! We can never get enough reinforcement. Thanks, again, for a great read!
Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries… Clients won’t walk all over us, unless we let them. Remember: Freelancers never work FOR a client. They always work WITH a client. It’s an equal partnership.
Excellent teaching moments and talking points, Paul. As I often tell my voiceover students, when you hear a cacophony of voices in your head, you may think you’re neurotic. Yet when those voices confidently and capably come out of your mouth, you have the chops to be a narrator.
Turn the cacophony into a symphony. That way, they speak in formation.
I love it!
Wow. I can really relate to this one! Thanks, Paul.
Im glad to hear that, Susan.
I think I might be Ella! This article is just what I needed. Now I have to put it into practice!
You’re not alone, Lind. I’m glad this story spoke to you.
Thanks again Paul!
It’s a little spooky how in-tune you are to important things for me… hmm.
I’m greatful.
I must have psychic powers, Brad. Don’t worry. I only use them for blogging.
Great blog Paul. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think the photo here is depicting Ariel…The Little Mermaid, who in Disney’s version becomes a princess…but one who knows her mind, and goes for it, and ultimately in the story, is rewarded.
You can be a nice person, and still strong. You can ask for what you want without being rude. I make strong requests all the time.
Especially as a woman, that can sometimes be a fine line to walk. There is still a double standard and an expectation in our culture around women
being submissive, and sometimes even subservient. As actors, (male or female) we all want to please…and sometimes, at all costs. There are role models out there making new roads, but sometimes, in our little worlds, you still have to be strong and ask/fight for what you want… as a woman, as an actor, as a professional, as a business person. Sometimes, that will cost you a job. But my thought is those jobs lost are probably not the ones you want anyway. Work to cultivate clients who respect you as a person, and respect your talent, and understand the cost of hiring a professional. Thanks!
Thanks for picking up the symbolism behind Ariel’s image. As we’ve seen with Meghan Markle, modern women can be strong and likable at the same time. They may find their price charming, and yet choose to walk down the aisle by themselves and refuse to “obey.” Learning to say “NO” is one of the most important skills any freelancer can master.
Hi Paul. Oh, what joy it is yet again to read your well written witty post. Bedankt! Best wishes from Berlin. Viktor
My pleasure, Viktor. Thanks for stopping by.
I always thought of me to be a really nice person and this is the question I often asked myself when I was in such a position and believe me, I was stuck in it A LOT. Niceness can be often confused with naiveness and when I finally managed to separate those two things, I knew I was on the right course 🙂