BEING BOSSED AROUND

Voice-overs love talking into microphones. No surprise there. That’s why a number of colleagues have embraced the podcast as a medium to spread their message.

Truth be told, I have a love – hate relationship with podcasts. You may remember my story “The problem with podcasting” where I explain why podcasts are not my thing:

“I spend very little time listening to podcasts. I’d rather read an article than listen to forty minutes of blah-blah-blah. An article or blog post I can scan in a short amount of time. I search for keywords, and skip the fluff.

Done. On to the next one.

Am I going to listen to a forty-minute podcast to possibly pick up a few useful ideas?

No thank you.

But there’s another reason why most podcasts are not my cup of tea.

I have no patience for mediocrity, half-ass efforts, or for untalented amateurs playing radio.”

This admission unleashed a storm of hate mail the likes I had never experienced before. People called me an arrogant sun of a gun, a failed, jealous blogger, and all kinds of other names I don’t care to repeat in public. It was clear that I had stepped on some very sensitive, potty-mouthed toes.

LISTENING TO MYSELF

This hasn’t stopped me from appearing on podcasts. I’m always honored that people seem to think I have interesting things to say, but here’s what you should know:

I rarely listen back to my interviews. Why is that?

Honestly, I feel more comfortable trusting my thoughts to my computer than to an interviewer. You see, writing gives me time to organize my ideas, and rephrase sentences until I’m happy with my words. Being interviewed is a spontaneous process (especially when it’s live), and it’s much easier to fumble and stumble. Once your words are out, you can’t take ’em back!

I tend to self-analyze while I’m talking, and I lose my train of thought wondering what point I was trying to make. Sounds familiar? On top of that, my post-stroke brain is often foggy, forgetful, and disorganized. What comes out of my mouth tends to be a reflection of that.

So, when Anne Ganguzza and Gabby Nistico asked me to be a guest on the VO BOSS podcast, I had to talk myself into doing it. One of the reasons for my hesitation was connected to my struggle to control my feelings in public.

ACCESSING EMOTIONS

It’s ironic: right after my stroke I couldn’t access my emotions, no matter how hard I tried. I could sense they were waiting behind a huge wall, but I had no way of reaching them. I felt disassociated from what was happening to me, and my speaking voice was monotone and robotic. Only after many, many hours of speech therapy was I able to begin to infuse my words with some emotion.

In March of this year, during VO Atlanta, a miracle happened. I unexpectedly broke through the impenetrable wall, and the floodgates opened! Since then I’ve become this overly sensitive and sappy guy whose eyeballs start leaking while watching sad and sweet stories on TV. I’m particularly moved by people helping people who are down on their luck.

Those who are close to me say it’s a good thing that a man dares to be vulnerable and show some emotions. They wish more men would show that side of their personality. To me it feels like I have no choice but to tear up, and I’d like to be able to control my feelings a bit better.

One of the things I have learned during my recovery is that I can’t force anything to happen. It will happen when the time is right. Perhaps I will always stay this way, and you’ll catch me crying during a podcast. Perhaps I’ll get a grip and contain myself in the future.

MY VO BOSS MOMENT

So, here’s the interview with Anne and Gabby. The one I’m not going to listen to.

Will you do the honors?

A huge thank you to the VO Boss team for having me on the show, and thank you for listening to the podcast!

Can I please get back to my computer?

Paul Strikwerda ©nethervoice

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