The two women were sitting opposite each other in the ski lodge. Their kids were out on the slopes and so they had all morning to catch up.
I usually don’t mind other people’s business, but these two were very hard to ignore. Their voices were as loud as the bling they were wearing. Even though they were dressed in the latest ski apparel, I don’t think either of them had any intention of ever going down a snowy hill.
This morning they seemed to be discussing their favorite topic: family illness.
“My father just went in for a double bypass,” said the one closest to me, as she was digging deep into a
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Great points, Paul – of course, if more people actually took just your first challenge, we probably could’ve dispensed with most of the presidential debates! Seriously…I know what you mean about listening and understanding what the other person is thinking or saying. Dale Carnegie, in fact, said that showing a genuine interest in other people was the primary way to ‘win friends and influence people.’ If you’re interested in them, they’ll love you – and hopefully you’ll gain their interest, as well.
I hear you, Matt. I’m glad to have so many interesting and interested friends like you!
I echo what Matt said.
But I also have to say I’m all too aware of the cacophony we live in. Despite that it’s inaudible, nearly everyone on social media is trying (desperately) to be heard. For one reason or another. Standing on their soap boxes and trying to sell their brand, or offering opinion on this or that. Trouble is – as Paul pointed out – everyone’s so busy yammering, no one is listening. Very tiring.
Thankfully, I do not find very much on television entertaining anymore. Some might say I’m “missing out on what’s current.” Sorry. I couldn’t care less what celebrities do, unless it’s the infrequent instance where they’re doing something for a good cause.
Apart from taking a break to listen to music here and there, I choose to spend considerable time with no aural stimulation, other than what’s necessary to do my work. It’s amazing how refreshing and even rewarding thinking can be when it’s done in silence.
Listening is good. But quiet is very good, too. I highly recommend both.
I couldn’t agree more. Quietude is therapeutic. Noise pollution is rampant and harmful. Robert Koch said in 1880:
I’ve had few of those conversations and, sad to say, I’ve been the one not listening too often. Always in a hurry and not willing to take the time to really listen.
Thanks for the reminder, Paul.
Hey Paul, most of my posts are “notes to self.” I’ve been there. I’ve done that and sometimes I’m still doing it. See how many times I referred to myself in this answer? There I go again!
Highly recommendable ‘notes to self’, Paul! The art of (active) listening and its influence on acting (acting is reacting), the importance of quietude, and above all: the art of making choices!
Thank you so much, Nelleke. Leuk om een reactie uit Nederland te krijgen. Maak er een fijn weekend van!
As always Paul – you’re dead on in your analysis. As a journalist myself for more than 26 years, I found your take on listening to be accurate. I can think of about a dozen young journalists who could benefit from your essay – and one older one here who also appreciated your tips on the art of acting. Shared on FB with much thanks…
In this moment I say takk! For your ever illuminating insights into the 1,001 ways we can better ourselves.
Paul, you may know this quote: “So then faith cometh by hearing…”
Romans 10:17
Seemed to fit the topic
And ‘quiet’ is precisely the reason I live in the country :-)Paul, I find that I just can’t wait for your next blog! This one is particularly precious and I will re-tweet.
Thanks, Paul, for another insightful and entertaining post. I really love the experiment you participated in as a journalist. I can relate to it. You think you’re paying attention but you’re not! Humbling.
Awhile ago, I was working in the theatre with a group of actors, hearing and deaf. In the midst of the process, the director said to me, “You know the only actor who really listens, pays attention to the direction, is the deaf actor.”
And it was true, aside from the fact that this actor was truly gifted and skilled it was odd that compared to all the equally talented and experienced hearing actors, he never ever needed to be told something twice nor did he ask a question that had already been answered (unlike the rest of the actors). This was a professional group, most who had worked on Broadway.
Thank you all for your wonderful feedback. Usually, I have a lot to say, but in the spirit of the article I’ll attempt to be quiet for a while and listen…. Let’s see for how long that lasts 🙂
Huh… what’d you say?
Nice piece, Paul. I like to think I’m a decent listener most of the time. This is a good reminder to listen well, often. Especially when the three greatest sources I have to refer to as NOT good listeners are … the politician clowns up in Washington, DC, my father and my wife.
Hear, hear!
Paul I finally had a “quiet” moment to appreciate your wonderful words – and you do have a way with them. Thank you. I scrolled down to look for the donate button, but can’t find it! Where has it gone?
Once you’re on my Walk MS Page, you’ll find the button underneath the first picture on the right-hand side of the page.
“Acting is reacting” sums it up. We are actors, and listening is an integral part in any acting class. Which means acting is as important for a VO artist to study as is editing, mic technique, etc.
Thanks for a great article!
Listening is the art and practice of putting someone else’s speaking, thinking and feeling needs ahead of your own.